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The right word may be effective, but no word was ever as effective as a rightly timed pause.

The rule is perfect: in all matters of opinion our adversaries are insane.

The secret source of humor is not joy but sorrow; there is no humor in Heaven.

The trouble ain't that there is too many fools, but that the lightning ain't distributed right.

The very ink with which history is written is merely fluid prejudice.

The wit knows that his place is at the tail of a procession.

There are basically two types of people. People who accomplish things, and people who claim to have accomplished things. The first group is less crowded.

There are lies, damned lies and statistics.

There are people who can do all fine and heroic things but one - keep from telling their happiness to the unhappy.

There are several good protections against temptation, but the surest is cowardice.